rolled up in a gym mat

have you ever been rolled up in a gym mat?
its happened to me many times
I went to treatment at the tender age of 13
cause I had a "drug" problem
when you throw "fits"
they restrain you by throwing you in a padded room with a big phonebook
tearing the pages out is supposed to make you feel better
well, it didnt
so i would throw a bigger fit
ha, cause i was 13
so in order for you not to hurt yourself
they would hold you to the blue, smelly, worn out
gym mat
then roll you up
then, even though i only weighed 93 lbs.
a really larger man would sit on top of that mat
seriously
what is the reason for this
i fought to breathe
my first bought with anxiety
i thought i was having a heart attack
still get them to this day
15 years later
so you could trick the system
in treatment
by pretending to do all your "steps"
oh yes i mean the 12 steps
and by kissing ass
alot alot of ass
and by pretending that you are genuinely happy
i did
but when they werent looking
at night
i would slip out of my room
sneak to the laundry room
and make out with billy
hmm.. i wonder what ever happened to billy
and if he still has bad breathe
and if i do ever find you billy
yes, i do still have my hot pink daisy duke silk shorts

I am obssessed with the eighties
music
movies
well, thats about it
I was too young to remember the political stuff
so, I drive this van
from the eighties of course
with only a tape deck
cause im too cheep to put in a cd player
and to be honest I didnt think the van would last more than two months
not a year and a half
so, i have to have something to listen to
so i go to the salvation army
to buy tapes
and wow
this last time i got some dooseys
nkotb
paula abdul
debbie gibson
roxette
reality bites soundtrack
ok so i got like 25 of them
so im cruising to my friends today
to make sure she shut her oven off
I know...
and I pop in lisa loeb
how is it
that after 15 years
i can still remember every oh and ah
so there i am
singing my heart out to....stay...
and I find "the tape"
you know those recording booths
at fairs
where you can sing the words and they record your voice with the music
I did it
many many times
I lived up the street from valleyfair
many season passes
so the tape I found
was paula abdul
forever your girl, you know the one
"hey baby, you got to remember, im forever your girl"
"forever and ever....im forever your girl"
I WAS HORRIBLE
why didnt anyone ever tell me
I sing all the time now
every chance I get
its like having spinach in your teeth
(which i would never eat)
but you know
how can someone not tell you
that its there
or that you suck!
ok, ok maybe here and there ive noticing people whincing when i open my mouth to sing
but damn
friends are supposed to tell you these things
damn, im rambling alot
about a tape

probably because i have nothing better to talk anout right now
besides our latest barbie fashion show
and the fact that once again
the carpenters came too early and i was naked when they came in
why cant they knock
who frickin wears clothes in the middle of the day anyway?
i certainly dont
oh well...I think im going to go paint something

damn other bloggers and their funny posts

So, Like the unemployed loser that I am
Im sitting here trying to think of something funny to write
but all that is happening
is this stupid song keeps popping into my head
I was looking around on the blogger sites and found this guy
and of course his blog was about different strokes
NOW I CANT GET THE GODDAM SONG OUT OF MY HEAD
im gonna have to call everyone I know
and have them sing to me
(my frieends hate when i do that)
but I dont care
im gonna bug em and bug em and bug em
I am so not feeling original today
or on track.
i just keep losing focus on what i was thinking about
but one thing stays constant

"different strokes to rule the world..yes it does.......it takes different strokes to rule the world.......hmmmmm"