Think im gonna sing myself a lullaby
feel free to listen...
what will never happen to me
is the fairytale i made up in my head
that flash of lightening
i feel when i see him
the world stopping when we kiss
my body tingling when i hold his hand
melting at the sight of his smile
his hand on my leg
(i forgot to shave, watch out)
when i moved out
i went to the tattoo parlor
picked out a sentiment
for my foot
a chinese symbol for love
above my toes
so when i start to feel the tingles
i can kick love in the ass with my symbol
i know it sounds silly
but when i feel something
i let it go further than it should
i let them sleep in my bed
i take off my clothes
slip off my shoes
look down at my toes
and remember the hurt
feeling my gut flipping over
from being ripped to shreds
when i left
"i never loved you"
"i dont feel that way about you"
"go read your damn book and stop talking to me"
" i just want you to leave"
those words
and the reminder above my toes
is what stops me dead in my tracks
from opening my world to someone sweet and gentle
kiss me on the forehead again
and watch the blood drain from my face
dont treat me like a princess
unless you are going to make me your queen
i block out the sweet ones
because they scare me
its not real
it will go away
i just have to take off my shoes to remember
to forget
not saying that it will ever happen
but if i did choose to open myself up again
i want to wait for the first kiss
i want it to be perfect
in the park
under the stars
gentle breeze
carve our initials into the tree
with a knife you just happen to have in your pocket
be interested in what i say
and mean it
and love me
until the end of time
be my prince
and save me from the evil witch
wake me from this coma
of hatred
and antitrust
i wont bite the apple again
i promise
find my glass slipper
and take me to your castle
and give me babies
and sweet kisses in my sleep
my fairytale will not come true
because i wont let it
im taking off my shoes right now
to remind myself
that it hurts.
blogger friends: why do you let me write this shit? im continually depressing myself.. ill make up something fun tomorrow, i promise..please submit pictures for the "men of blogger" calendar ill be working on this weekend.itll be worth your while....would i ever let you down?
