I am alive
i didnt get murdered by my internet boyfriend.
im not sure how i feel about this today
i dont know if i want this kind of a relationship right now
everything went well, but i got freaked out
the whole time i kept thinking
is this right?
do i like him enough to try to make a huge commitment
im not sure that i do
dont get me wrong
he is a wonderful boy
funny
sweet
easy on the eyes
but im not sure he's the one
I dont want to spend all my energy on someone i dont want to spend the rest of my life with
i wasted 14 years doing that with two other guys
im a mommy now and i cant risk it
when i meet the right one
ill know
i feel so bad
i know he will read this
and i dont wanna break his little heart
because i like talking to him everyday
as friends
and thats all
oh i am so stuck
ive been trying to find a way to tell him for two days
and its hurting my head
and interrupting my sleep
i am not a bitch
and i never wanted to hurt him
but when you know, you know
and i know
that he's not the one
this is not helping
im getting even more nervous
off i go....
im not sure how i feel about this today
i dont know if i want this kind of a relationship right now
everything went well, but i got freaked out
the whole time i kept thinking
is this right?
do i like him enough to try to make a huge commitment
im not sure that i do
dont get me wrong
he is a wonderful boy
funny
sweet
easy on the eyes
but im not sure he's the one
I dont want to spend all my energy on someone i dont want to spend the rest of my life with
i wasted 14 years doing that with two other guys
im a mommy now and i cant risk it
when i meet the right one
ill know
i feel so bad
i know he will read this
and i dont wanna break his little heart
because i like talking to him everyday
as friends
and thats all
oh i am so stuck
ive been trying to find a way to tell him for two days
and its hurting my head
and interrupting my sleep
i am not a bitch
and i never wanted to hurt him
but when you know, you know
and i know
that he's not the one
this is not helping
im getting even more nervous
off i go....
posted by GingerSnaps at 9:46 PM
5 Comments:
First, I'm glad you're still alive. And you're right, you'll know it when it happens. I met my husband online a little over 10 years ago, and I've been married for 9 and a half. But I knew the first time we met in person.
By telling him that he's not the one for you, you're also letting him know that you're not the right one for him. You each deserve to find the person who will complete you. By letting him know up front, you're allowing the both of you the chance to find that person. It's always best to be honest.
You really will "know." Keep looking till you find it.
I am so depressed now. I dont know what s wrong with me. I have been crying for hours and hours..in trying to deal with this poor sweet boy, I got so exausted i fell asleep, had a really intense sex dream about my babys dad and when i woke up i wanted to kill him for invading my dream..it was almost like i felt the pain of our breakup surge thru me again. it stings. then i have to go see him to pick up my daughter and its all i can do to not beg him to let me back in...what the hell is wrong with me?
maybe i need stronger drugs...and i need to become a lesbian..
You don't need stronger drugs -- you just need to be honest with him and tell him you didn't feel any chemistry -- you just want to be friends.
Sure you'll hurt him. But not telling him and letting him find out later would hurt him more. Do it for both of you.
I've met a few men on the internet. Maybe you know this, but for safety reasons, make sure that a trusted friend has the guy's name, address, phone number, and where you are meeting if you do this again. And once you reach your meeting place, call your friend (in front of your date) to let him/her know you've reached your destination. Safety first!
gina
http://findingmygroove.blog-city.com
Let the sex dream go, girlfriend. It's probably just about being afraid of something new and not because you want the old one back. It's always easier to revert back to what we already know than it is to go out and find something new. There's nothing wrong with you... you're reacting the way pretty much anybody would.
Thanks for the kind words about my mom. Her surgery is scheduled to begin in 7 minutes, and will take anywhere from 4-6 hours. I'll let you know when I hear anything.
i know i should let it go, but he was the only one EVER to make me climax during just sex. i dont know why its not like he didi anything special with his willy..it just fit perfect i think.
this is the first time ive met anyone from online and im not sure ill ever do it again. it was very awkward.
all that intense conversation and then you see them and feel nothing.
jaded..I will be waiting to hear about your mom..
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