the gyno is fun
went to the gyno today
tests ands tuff
she puts in the speculum
i whine as usual
cause lets face it girls
the things hurt like a bitch
cold
metal
stuck in your crotch
i try to make a joke
to lighten the mood
so i say to my doctor(as shes scraping my vaginal walls)
i dont know how i stand having sex cause having something stuck in my crotch really hurts
she laughs
pinches my vagina(on accident)
and says
"do you know how many people i want to say that to"
frickin whiners
p.s. women, please remember to give yourself monthly breast exams. it is very very important
tests ands tuff
she puts in the speculum
i whine as usual
cause lets face it girls
the things hurt like a bitch
cold
metal
stuck in your crotch
i try to make a joke
to lighten the mood
so i say to my doctor(as shes scraping my vaginal walls)
i dont know how i stand having sex cause having something stuck in my crotch really hurts
she laughs
pinches my vagina(on accident)
and says
"do you know how many people i want to say that to"
frickin whiners
p.s. women, please remember to give yourself monthly breast exams. it is very very important
posted by GingerSnaps at 3:50 AM
5 Comments:
God how I hate the speculum. Curse the speculum, loathe the speculum. Hope everything comes out all right.
tell your bitch of a doctor to shove it. Sorry but there is no comparing a penis to a speculum, hard cold metal that you aren't "warmed up for" is not the same...
grrr... my doctor kept them in a little speculum warmer, which was great but its still no fun...
lmk, ha! mine keeps them warm too. and uses the warm lube. oh, the little things...
i still hate going. ewww, the scraping of the cervix... ouch.
My first time at a gyno, who unfortunately was male, I was 17, scared out of my mind because I was having unbelievable cramps and words like endometriosis were getting flung around. He puts the damn thing in and I make this face of pain and he says "hey, if you can handle sex, you can handle this." Nice bedside manner. At that point I hadn't even told him I wasn't a virgin. And when I told him that my boyfriend was in the Navy, he piped up that I definitely had to be tested for STDs then. Great doctor, needless to say I never went back to him!
Mesabi, I vote we hunt that guy down and shoot him! After we shove a speculum, dipped in dry ice, up his ass. No lube.
I had a similar experience when I went to the Dr. to get birth control at 18, and he sneered, "Do you need an AIDS test, too?" Like I was slutting around or something.
I, too, get pampered by the gel warmer, the speculum warmer, and a very quick pinch.
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