my lovely daughter
so, we went to the park today, as we do everyday at three oclock.
everything was going fine. she was playing with her park buddy ben, whose dad i am friends with, for about 45 minuted while we grownups sat at the picnic table talking about how horrible our exes are.
i walk over to check on the kids because they are out of site under the slide and everything appears to be ok. i ask then if they need water."nope, were ok mom"
so i resume talking to my friend when his little boy comes running over to us yelling something i couldnt understand.
i jump up and run towards my daughter, thinking she was hurt, when she runs out from under the slide, with nothing on her bottom. i listen harder to what the boy is saying and all i can make out is the word "poop"
my heart sank
my daughter had removed her clothing and took a giant poop underneath the slide in the rocks and is now running towards the grass saying that shes not done.
i am running aftre her to try to take her to the bathroom when i see her squat under a tree to finish her business.
well, i decide that i better go to the van and get the paper towels so that she has something to wipe with so i do, while my friend is looking for her poop under the slide. he couldnt find it.
she finishes and i wipe her butt and clean up her mess and throw it away and walk over to where hes looking. she says"i know where it is mom" and dives her hand into a pile of rocks. apparently she covered it up herself with rocks LIKE A DOG!
i find it, throw it away, wash our hands , oick her up and run like hell to the van to go straight home. all the while my friend is laughing and telling me how funny this story will be to tell when she grows up.
on the way home she asks me if i am happy. i tell her not really. she says "i love you mom" i say "i love you too maddie" then she says "i wont poop in the park anymore mom, but i really had to go"
i love being a mommy!
everything was going fine. she was playing with her park buddy ben, whose dad i am friends with, for about 45 minuted while we grownups sat at the picnic table talking about how horrible our exes are.
i walk over to check on the kids because they are out of site under the slide and everything appears to be ok. i ask then if they need water."nope, were ok mom"
so i resume talking to my friend when his little boy comes running over to us yelling something i couldnt understand.
i jump up and run towards my daughter, thinking she was hurt, when she runs out from under the slide, with nothing on her bottom. i listen harder to what the boy is saying and all i can make out is the word "poop"
my heart sank
my daughter had removed her clothing and took a giant poop underneath the slide in the rocks and is now running towards the grass saying that shes not done.
i am running aftre her to try to take her to the bathroom when i see her squat under a tree to finish her business.
well, i decide that i better go to the van and get the paper towels so that she has something to wipe with so i do, while my friend is looking for her poop under the slide. he couldnt find it.
she finishes and i wipe her butt and clean up her mess and throw it away and walk over to where hes looking. she says"i know where it is mom" and dives her hand into a pile of rocks. apparently she covered it up herself with rocks LIKE A DOG!
i find it, throw it away, wash our hands , oick her up and run like hell to the van to go straight home. all the while my friend is laughing and telling me how funny this story will be to tell when she grows up.
on the way home she asks me if i am happy. i tell her not really. she says "i love you mom" i say "i love you too maddie" then she says "i wont poop in the park anymore mom, but i really had to go"
i love being a mommy!
posted by GingerSnaps at 5:04 PM
32 Comments:
Ah, the joys of parenthood.
Could you imagine life before paper towels or disposable wipes?
Barbaric, I say!
i could not ubie, i could not.
Kids do the funniest things!
Thanks for a good laugh!
WOW.... funniest blog ever...
But believe me she will find int hilarious when she is older. oh the things I did as a child!
-LMK
I would have been mortified. Luckily it was you not me. It's one of those things that you laugh at after the fact.
You wrote that just to cheer me up didn't you! LOL
i did brooke, i did.
i was mortified at first then i laughed about it. i still cant beleive it happened. i had to call her dad at work and tell him
poop in the park?
LOL. hilarious! and yeah, it would make a great stroy to tell when she is in the i-am-16-but-am-almost-an-adult stage.
What a smart and resourceful child you have! I love her and I love you for not shaming her.
Life's a joy! Trust me, she'll find many other ways to make you say uhhhhhh as time goes on. Trust me!
LOL that is so almost cute but my head is still comprehending it. When I was younger and in daycare (i dont know why i can remember this) but a kid took this huge super dump in the toilet and decided we all had to see it. Instead of saying "Hey come see this guys!" he picked it out and brought it to us with a, excuse the pun, shit eating grin from ear to ear. Impressive is all i could think at the time then it was off to watch Captain Kangaroo.
Just remember when nature calls there is no concept of location,time or muscle response sometimes.
cheyenne, you always find a way to make me laugh so loud that i wake up my daughter!
mistyeiz...i like to hit next blog. i find alot of interesting people that way.
That is hilarious. My son once pooped in his room and smeared it all over his bedroom walls. Yuk! But kids will do the darndest things won't they.
This story is definitely something you can roll out when she's a teenager and brings home that boy you don't like ;o) Brilliant!
This was hilarious. I wish I could have seen the look on your face when you noticed your daughter taking the dirty dunk at the park.
Now, and I mean this sincerely, that's some funny shit!
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Class! It is one of the joys of parenthood when they try their best to embarass you in public. As you say great blackmail material.
R.U. Serious stole my thunder. At least she was honest and led you to the scene of the crime.
I had to share the story at the pub last night. It went over well.
Back when I used to take dooks at the park there were no rocks to cover it up with. We had to use grass, like the heathens used to do.
ace, i did that as a child and i have never lived it down.
beefhart, i will not like any boy she ever dates so i think shes screwed either way
ruben, it was a look of shock.
r u serious, i figured id get a pun from you..
bob, she doe sit all the time!(not poops in the park, but embarrasses me) when she farts she always blames it on me cause thats what her dad does.
nate, she is a very honest kid, plus she didnt think she did anything wrong.
evercurious, i cant go to the bar until sunday but you can bet thatll be my story for the night.
nick, back when? dont you still?
isnt it grant?
i actually just went to my mother-in-laws and she told me that my precious daughter did it at her house once too, they didnt think it ws a big deal since they dont have neighbors for miles around, but, i think its a big deal. i dont want her to drop trou i the parking lot at walmart..
Are you sure? Wal Mart has been selling shit for years, why not give some back?
what the hell are you doing up so late?
Jadette is 3 and wants nothing to do with the potty yet. Oh, she likes to sit naked on the big girl potty, but she won't actually go. When she has to poop, she hides behind something. If you ask if she has to poopy, she give you the sign fors "all done, all done stop stop stop" turns her back then does her business. She hasn't yet dropped her drawers and pooped in the park yet, but it would come as no surprise if she ever does.
Kids. Amazing.
This is me relaxed. I thought you liked it being up?
hmm, i do. since when do you talk naughty??
That was pretty funny.
oh man...horribly adorable!
Make kids and love kids. Point and laugh at kids because they're completely bizarre, but make kids and love kids first. :)
LMFAO! That was hysterical!
thank you all vewry much...ill be back tomorrow with some fun bar stories as i am leaving now to go get my drink on!
I don't talk naughty. What're you talking about?
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